


Your Catholic is Catching

by alphera



Series: Your Catholic is Catching [1]
Category: Daredevil (TV)
Genre: Gen, Irreverent Treatment of Catholicism, M/M, Teen for language and irreverence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-20
Updated: 2016-04-20
Packaged: 2018-06-03 08:44:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,687
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6604357
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alphera/pseuds/alphera
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Foggy’s most memorable experiences with Matt’s Catholicism.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Your Catholic is Catching

**Author's Note:**

  * For [aeria_cretin](https://archiveofourown.org/users/aeria_cretin/gifts).



> Warning: I am super sorry for anyone who might be offended by the general irreverence. 
> 
> Ok. Rambly cracky fic ahead! Matt and Foggy met in 2010. I’m putting his first mass experience then, as it’s before the new translations. The new translations started getting rolled out in 2011. Not that it matters, as the Easter Vigil doesn’t have the penitential rite as far as I remember. But Foggy doesn’t know that.
> 
> Also, if anyone wants to know why I know these things - I am a (secretly) Very Lapsed Catholic from a Long Line of Catholics. Complete with Opus Dei aunts and uncles. (Yes, that group Dan Brown wrote about. No, they aren’t really like that. At least to my knowledge.) (No, I will never tell the family I’m not actually Catholic anymore, because my grandmother might literally drop dead. Also they will pray approximately 100000000000 novenas for me. It will be very stressful and guilt inducing.)
> 
> If anyone wants to write Catholic fic, feel free to consult with me! (us?)
> 
> There will probably be more of this verse from me and [aeria_cretin](https://archiveofourown.org/users/aeria_cretin/pseuds/aeria_cretin). Because Catholicism will always be strange and interesting, even after a lifetime of being exposed to it.
> 
> Also on [Tumblr](http://breakforsanity.tumblr.com/post/143094400362/your-catholic-is-catching).

 

**1\. CONFITEOR**

_Confiteor: the prayer commonly used in the penitential rite of the Holy Eucharist._

 

Foggy’s family had never been particularly religious. Nor spiritual, for that matter. The most any one of them had gone towards the path of Faith and Goodness was his sister briefly embracing buddhism - but even that was mostly brought about by trying to avoid their parents’ weird fixation with having at least one kid becoming a butcher. (1)

It was very convenient, citing religion as the reason for refusing to kill animals for a living. Of course, this only really lasted until the next Great Nelson Family Barbecue. There’s nothing like the smell of steak permeating everything to test one’s resolve.

He’d gone to a few churches back in the day. There was always something appealing about just  _believing_ in something.

Sadly (or not), it didn’t really work out.

And then there was Matt. Matt, who was basically the most oddly religious close friend he’d ever had (except Brett, but Brett was a frenemy).

Of course, Matt also went around beating people up and basically lied to everyone about himself. But Catholics were into good works, right? And… he guessed what Matt’s been doing counts? In a way? If you kind of ignored the violence and vengeance?

Whatever. The amount of wars and godly retribution in the bible amounted to basically a hell lot anyway. Besides, “do not judge that thou shalt not be judged”(2), right? He’s pretty sure that’s a real thing Father Lantom once quoted pointedly on his parish website after a debate on vigilantism blew up on twitter. (And really, that priest’s blatant favouritism was a little bit shameful. Also suspicious. Or was it only suspicious because Foggy was In The Know?)

He remembers the one time he attended Catholic Mass with Matt, a long time ago. They’d spent a good few long hours Easter eve in the church. The whole standing and sitting and kneeling in unison was kind of cool, and the he actually really liked the incense. The amount of bible readings (Liturgy of the Word, Matt called it) was kind of excessive, but he’d gotten the idea that normally it was much less.

And the lighting of the candles at the start was beautiful and captivating, hands down.

The point was - Foggy had basically been introduced to the whole thing through the most intense service there was.(3) After that, he’d thought nothing could blindside him anymore. After all, religion, especially the Catholic Church, didn’t really change much.

… It was so much harder to suppress laughter at the unexpected.

But really, what was he supposed to do, when right at the beginning of the service, before Foggy even had time to really settle into the feel of the whole thing, everyone just started chanting “through my fault, through my fault, through my most grievous fault” while <i>beating their breasts</i>?

Foggy let out a strangled little sound, and only really managed to change his hysterical laughter into coughs because Matt elbowed him *really hard* on the side. (Which was just plain *ow*, Matt and his ninja skills were totally unfair.)

Frankly, everything after that was a blur. Maybe a little on the literal side, seeing as he had to hold his breath a couple (a lot) of times to stop himself from laughing again.

Matt’s love affair with guilt made _so much_ more sense now, though. Not to mention the sense of drama. It made Foggy want to cry a little inside.

Mostly though, it made him laugh.

So much.

He couldn’t wait to tell everyone about this. EVERYONE.

\-----

(1) A lot of Buddhist schools have some form of restriction on meat. Beef is generally not allowed, and fish generally allowed.

(2) He is paraphrasing. Any one of Matthew 7:1, Luke 6:37 and James 4:12 could be the quote Father Lantom used. Probably Matthew because… well, Matthew. But the Luke verse is actually in a Sunday gospel, while the Matthew version only appears in weekday mass. (There could be more verses with this general theme, but I only know these three)

(3) False. Healing masses. HEALING MASSES ARE WAY MORE INTENSE. (Where people get anointed and FAINT for goodness’ sake!)

 

**\-------**

 

**2\. SLAIN IN THE SPIRIT**

 

_To be Slain in the Spirit is the phenomena of people falling prostrate on the floor in deep feeling in a religious ceremony, usually after being anointed with Holy Oil._

 

After the whole _mea maxima culpa_ incident of 2015, and on a night where it felt like he’d had about 5 gallons of alcohol in his system, Foggy rambled for over an hour about how Matt _made so much sense now_ , now that he’d seen the drama of Catholic masses.

Matt’s response, to Foggy’s disbelief, was “those weren’t even that dramatic. You’ve haven’t seen anything yet”.

Foggy, of course, was curious as a cat on its last life. So he said he wanted to see one. Matt’s infuriating little smirk only egged him on, and besides, really, what *else* could really happen to shock him?

Shock may have been the wrong thing to watch out for.

An hour or so into Healing Mass, he found himself half on Matt’s lap. Where he kind of fell into when he fainted.

Yes. He fainted.

Of smoke inhalation, true, but he still fainted. Just like that line of people in front of the priest.

Of all the days to discover that his childhood asthma hadn’t completely gone, it _really_ had to be this one.

Matt smiled smugly at him from his vantage point right above Foggy’s face.

“Looks like you fit right in.” Matt said.

Foggy was never going to hear the end of this.

(The next time Foggy meets Father Lantom, the priest smiles at him with a most irritatingly innocent looking expression and says “You know, you should consider converting. You’re already ahead of Matt. He’s never been slain in the spirit before”.) (1)

(Looks like the whole “butter wouldn’t melt in my mouth” thing runs in the collective Catholic consciousness too.) (2)

\-----

(1) Slain in the spirit is the term used when people fall after getting anointed by the Holy Spirit. A lot of people feel pressured to fall, but there are people who still fall but aren’t pressured to. So *shrug* mystery of life, eh? Personally, we’ve never fallen. And there are also people who attend these regularly and never fall. It really depends on the person.

(2) Only those with extreme exposure to nuns. It’s a survival tactic.

 

\-------

 

**3\. CALL TO ACTION I**

 

_Call to Action is a Catholic organization that advocates for equality and justice in order to build inclusive communities, regardless of race or gender._

 

It all starts when Brett Mahoney comes back after his first real personal leave since The Incident.

Well, it starts when he gets the invite for his cousin’s wedding. His lesbian cousin. Who he took leave to watch get married. In church.

“I know you’ve done the civil marriage thing, but why won’t you two get married in church?” He asks Foggy on his first day back. “I call dibs on best man. I mean, you’ve gotta have two, and you’ve only got Karen, don’t ya?” (1)

“What? Is that even allowed?” Foggy asks, honestly confused.

Brett blinks back at him. “Well. My cousin just got married to her girlfriend. We’re Episcopalian. And aren’t Catholics basically like us? Except with the pope?” (2)

Foggy sometimes just wants to put Brett through some sort of sensitivity training.

“No…” He says, slowly. “They’re really not.”

And that’s that. For about half a day. And then Foggy gets to really think about it, and panics a little inside.

Matt doesn’t really seem to mind. But then, Matt has a martyr complex at least the size of the Avengers Tower. Which is basically taller than everything and also runs deeper than most buildings in New York.

It takes three days for Foggy to crack.

Mostly, it takes Foggy bumping into Father Lantom in the grocery. Father Lantom _also_ doesn’t seem to mind, but… Father Lantom also doesn’t seem to mind Daredevil, so who knows how reliable a yardstick that guy is?

Does Catholic Guilt catch? Maybe. Probably. Seems so. (4)

Oh god, he is so screwed.

So, three days after Brett Mahoney opens the can of worms, Foggy sits Matt down for a Serious Discussion.

Matt snorts at him.

“Why in the world would you want the Catholic Church to recognize LGBT marriage? I mean, for me, yeah sure that’d be great. But Father Lantom would make us get married in church. You’d have to take all the sacraments. You’d have to be _Confirmed_.

Foggy stares blankly at Matt, and he’s so confused it actually takes him a full minute before he actually _tells_ Matt he’s staring blankly.

Matt sighs.

“Catechism, Foggy. You’d have to take Catechism. Not to mention marriage camps and marriage seminars. Father Lantom’s pretty strict about those. I mean, not that I don’t think we’ll pass with flying colours, but… who knows how many weekends of bible study and retreats we’d have to live through. You more than me, since I’ve already received the full set of sacraments. Do you really want to do that?”

Foggy thinks about it for a second, and stares intently at Matt. It honestly looks like Matt doesn’t mind, but… He knows how weirdly important the Church is to Matt, despite the Daredeviling and the… well, them. And he thinks about the beautiful churches he’s been dragged to over the years, the white flowers and the long walks and the beautiful hymns sung during mass, and…

“Actually. Yes. Yes I do.”

Matt’s smile, after blinking in shock for five straight minutes, is blinding. (3)

\-----

(1) It’s not that Brett’s ignoring Marci, it’s that he thinks Marci was more “godparent” or “mother of the groom” material.

(2) In this fic, Brett’s family is Episcopalian. Like Thurgood Marshall. :))

(3) Yes. Yes it does catch.

(4) Whoops surprise fluff. Also kind of moot right now. The Roman Catholic Church is nowhere near this point.

**Author's Note:**

> I got a few great questions in my comments from [immery](http://archiveofourown.org/users/immery/pseuds/immery) and [tryptophan](http://archiveofourown.org/users/tryptophan/pseuds/tryptophan), and I figured I should put them here:
> 
> 1) Healing masses: they are DEFINITELY not common. Matt just wanted a more extreme mass to take Foggy to, and I think there's nothing more extreme than this.  
> 2) Catholics marrying non-Catholics:  
> a) [Catholics can marry non-catholics](http://www.vatican.va/archive/ENG1104/__P41.HTM), but they need either permission (c. 1124) or [special dispensation](http://www.vatican.va/archive/ENG1104/__P3Y.HTM) from the bishop, depending on if the other party is baptised in a [recognised baptism or not](https://www.archbalt.org/evangelization/worship/rcia/upload/Validity-of-Baptisms-and-Confirmation.pdf) (c.1086). I am not sure which type of non-Catholic MCU Foggy would belong to, and do not know how easy or hard either process is. I'm going for Matt thinking it'd be difficult to obtain either of these. Or yeah, not knowing it's even possible to have a mixed marriage.  
> b) I also believe Foggy would want to go all the way. I've seen the special joy Catholics can get when their partners express they want to convert, even those that are not particularly devout and have never actually asked their partners to convert. I think Foggy would want to see that joy.  
> c) Marriage seminars and counselling meanwhile are required whether it's a mixed marriage or not (if I'm mistaken and it's not required for *all*, I'm sure at least that some priests refuse to marry couples who do not go through it).  
> d) Also... I wanted to show how Foggy would be willing to jump through all sorts of hoops for Matt.


End file.
